I work at the police department and even though I'm not an officer I learn so many things from reading their reports. I thought I would share some of the wisdom that I learned from just one shift.
If you have warrants and you think you are smart and will give a fake name and birthdate to fool the officers, be smart enough not to tell the officers your birthday is November 31. Congratulations you have just added failure to ID to your charges. Another suggestion, take care of your business then you don't have to worry about those warrants.
If you tell the officers that it wasn't you but your evil twin who was wearing the same clothes, you are still going to jail while your evil twin merrily goes on with their lives.
If a man offers to give you a massage because it's his hobby...just say no thanks. Really? women fall for this?
If you bought it in the parking lot, it's probably stolen. Actually you probably stole it, you just said you bought it from someone in the parking lot because you were stupid enough to go pawn it like there isn't a pawn shop detail looking for stolen merchandise.
If you don't know your friends last name, where they live, where they work, their phone number or pretty much anything about them except their physical description and that their street name is Spider, you probably shouldn't let them borrow your car.
Don't steal from Walmart. Walmart has cameras EVERYWHERE! They will bust you and they will make you go to jail. They do not let you just get a nice little citation to pay and send you on your merry way. Nope, you're going to jail. And don't think you're tricky not scanning certain items. There are cameras on the registers...duh! Don't think your sneaky switching tags even though you have your friend looking out for you there's probably a camera zooming in on you and you not only get a shoplifting charge but a fraud charge too. Hey here's a fabulous idea. Get a job and buy the things you can afford. If you can't afford them, leave them at the store.
Bottom line. Police officers aren't stupid. Criminals are.